Wednesday, April 1, 2009

When the wind blows.
Part Two.

Mercedes' body twitched like an addict craving its next fix. She tossed and turned as if the Captain of a ship battling a storm. She was having a nightmare. It was as if with each furrow of her brow, she revealed that this was more than just a bad dream. The worry and conflict that her face expressed in her unconscious sleep gave way to her inner turmoil. As the blaring alarm slowly made its way into the background noise of her dream, Captain Mercedes realized that the rescue siren was actually her alarm clock begging her to relieve it from its duty that had gone on for over two hours.

The effects of the previous night's self-pity pride parade were beginning to tune in as Mercedes sat up in bed and looked around. Two jugs of cheap Carlo Rossi Chablis wine. One empty jug of cheap wine; one half empty jug of wine; one wine glass. It disgusted her that she had consumed so much wine in one night and by herself too. What had brought her to such a low point? She reached for her big mug and cherished the few drops of water that were left. As she mad her way to the door, mug in hand, she saw a little plastic baggie,reaching for it she cringed at seeing just a tiny nug of weed. She just bought this sack and in one night she had smoked so much and by herself too. Why did she feel the need to do this? Her had finally reached the door knob, but she stopped. Lying on her desk was a rolled up dollar bill; residue of white powder stained her desk top, a razor blade peeped out from under her mouse pad. This made her feel guilty. She abused these pain killers that abused her nose. With every line she hoped to relieve some of her pain. She had snorted so much and by herself too. Why?

Mercedes opened her bedroom door to confront the reason for all this self destructing behavior. Standing hunched in the living room corner was her roommate. Mercedes stood in her doorway perturbed at the sight of Amy with her back towards her. In the dim light, Amy just out bed with her blue t-shirt and yellow and pink poke-a-dot shorts seemed incapable of causing the torment and grief Mercedes had experienced the night before. Looking at Amy on the phone made Mercedes heart sink; but everything changed once Amy turned around and they stood standing face to face.

"Ugh.' And with that they both turned and went in opposite directions. In the kitchen, Mercedes turned the faucet and watched her pain and frustration pour into her over sized mug. It bothered her that within two weeks the relationship she had with her roommate did a complete 180. Mercedes lingered in her doorway pining after a friend that lay behind closed doors. She tried to remember how this all started; she couldn't quite pinpoint what it was but ever since school started, something was different about Amy. Amy was never home and didn't have a cell phone, so she couldn't be reached. It almost seemed like Amy was purposely avoiding her, but why? Mercedes considered knocking; making amends.

She heard the wind rumble, shaking the whole house. Then she went into her room and closed the door.


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