Saturday, March 21, 2009

College Literature.

Back when I was in college, I stumbled across a case study about a psychotic girl who had violent outburst and the doctors did all these test on her and couldn't figure out what was wrong.

Thanks chris.peplin!

I remember sitting in a narrow row of books that went up to the ceiling and thinking how awful it must be for the girl and her family. I was actually looking for research material for a paper I was writing. See, I was taking an Asian literature class my freshman year and I we were reading this story about a girl who had to dress like a boy to go before the emperor...or was it the other way around. I forget which way it was, but I remember it was very interesting story and it was the first class I ever got a 4.0 in. It was my second quarter of college and I thought it was going to be cake if I could ace a 300 level class, but things got a little harder after that. Anyways, my professor was this woman who went to Harvard and I think I had a little crush on her. Actually maybe it wasn't a crush, I think I just really admired her. See, when I was in the fourth grade, my Dad look me to Boston. It was a really short trip, just long enough for him to watch a Celtics game, and honestly, I don't remember much, but what I do remember was the Harvard campus.

Thanks tgigreeny!

They don't have brick buildings where I grew up and it felt, well, very collegeic like exciting things were happening all around me, things that were going to change the world and I wanted to be a part of it. Needless to say, I fell in love and decided then that that's where I wanted to go to college. Turns out, I didn't know what I was falling in love with, after all I was only 10, it's like a little girl saying she wants to be a ballerina when she grows up, although I wasn't the girliest of girls and never wanted to be a ballerina and also never played with barbies, believe it or not. Like I was saying, I didn't know that I was falling in love with an ivy league school, but 7 years later when it was time for me to pick a college, I still had the technique of picking something by looks. See, I used to be an MTV junkie, I mean what high schooler isn't, right? I was watching MTV back when they actually played music videos, they were just venturing into the world of reality TV. Now, it's all reality shows, I mean I don't know for sure, I don't have cable and its been years since I watched. But back then they had this show called the Real World. I was obsessed with it! I remember thinking, 'that's what it must be like to be grown up and living on your own, in the real world'! What a fitting title.

Thanks the real truth!

This was before I realized what a joke it all was but back then I was hooked, and it just so happened that the Real World was in Seattle when I was a senior in high school, and man did they make Seattle look cool, so guess where I ended up for college. At least they were in a city with a decent school and when I saw the university of washington campus I fell in love all over again, I think I'm attracted to brick buildings because UW has a lot of those too, anyways, this time my love was tangible.

Thanks elephant wearing striped pants!

So my first year I took an Asian lit class and that's when I came across the case study. The thing was as I read it, the girl didn't seem much different from myself, her angst and self doubt, her inability to control certain impulses, her failure to keep her emotions in check, it made me wonder if I was psychotic and need someone to study my case. The thing is I never got to finish reading the case study, so I don't know if they ever found out what was wrong with her. Maybe it wasn't anything. Maybe it was hormones. Or maybe, she just grew out of it. I know I did. Not.


Robyn said...

is is srsly ridiculous for 17-year-olds to choose where to attend college, don't you think? i bet lots of ppl make decisions like you did. and yes, being enamored of brick. and wool coats. le sigh.

Emily said...

i know how it is to be enamored by things when your younger and then years later realize they could never live up to your expectations of them.

and btw...last year i seriously considered moving to seattle to attend university of washington for grad school but i bailed at the last minute. glad to see that you like it!! the campus really is gorgeous!

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