Friday, October 16, 2009

07.

Kenneth walked up his driveway smiling to himself as he thought about Melanie's enthusiasm of seeing her entire family. Melanie always talked very highly of her family, with such respect and trust; love. It was in such a way that Kenneth appreciated and so naturally assumed was something he desired for himself, yet there was something innate in Kenneth that unconsciously rejected the open arms of a loving family, perhaps it was because he didn't understand want it meant to be a family and only had a vague sense of unconditional love and support because although it seemed that these emotions should be automatic, when Kenneth unlocked his front door the reality that he stepped into was one he fully understood: his family, his house, his life didn't resemble Melanie's because Kenneth didn't belong in the suburbs; he was meant for the streets.

He quickly made his way through the living room that didn't have the warmth of a space you could relax and gather in, rather had the feeling of a storage room for random furniture and unwanted boxes. Although Kenneth's stepfather bought this house for his new wife over a year ago, anyone who stepped foot in the door would think they just moved in. The only part of the house that was unpacked and set up was their own bedroom. Kenneth often wondered what his mother's room looked like; he was strictly forbidden to enter her room, not that he really cared to go in there, but even if he did, he couldn't because at the request of his stepfather, the master bedroom was to be locked at all times. Kenneth sometimes believed that his mother's room wasn't locked because his stepfather had a lot of valuables and expensive electronics, because of course Kenneth could be trusted, it simply was locked because their room looked like the rest of the house: a bunch of unopened boxes, because they didn't want Kenneth to to see their room yet because they didn't have time to set it up, because she was never home.

Kenneth's mother now had a new career as a secretary at his stepfather's law firm and they worked a lot of late nights, maybe finishing up a case? If that wasn't it, maybe they were drinking tea on the green of some country club or going out to fancy dinner, or so Kenneth thought. He actually had no idea what kept his mother out so late, but now at the age of 17, he knew better than to wait up for her. The only difference Kenneth could see from living in the suburbs versus the housing projects, was the home he always knew to be a dilapidated apartment was now an extravagant mansion that he still couldn't feel comfortable in. Only the outer appearance of his residence had change, but inside everything was the same: Kenneth was alone.

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